There are times in our life when we go through negative scenarios and most often we lose our control.
Like when someone throw negative comments we retaliate and strike back at that person in the same ill manner.

Doing So will just make the situation worst. At the end of the day nobody wins. Only resentment and anger creeps in our hearts and our day will be ruined.

I'd like to share some ways to beat negative scenarios that confront us which I read this morning by Donald Latumahina

Latumahina's observation was adapted by a friend when his children confronted her a few months after she became a widow. Her four children told her she was not a good mother, not like their mother's friends. Instead of acting negatively, his friend apologized to her children.

"I'm sorry if I'm not an ideal mother to you. But this is the only way I know to raise you. I cannot give what I do not have" Her children were so touched on the frankness and truthfulness of their mother. With teary eyes, they embraced her . They told her that they were sorry for saying those hurtful things to her.

Here are some tips on how to deal positively on a negative situation.

NEVER RESPOND WHEN YOU ARE NOT CALM. take time to calm down first before you answer back.

TAKE A DEEP BREATH as a first step to calm yourself down.

SPEAK IN GENTLE TONE to reduce the tension of the situation.

LOOK AT THE CONTENT OF WHAT PEOPLE SAY TO YOU FOR SOMETHING POSITIVE that you can act upon to improve yourself. Don't just reject the whole message , for the rest of the message which is negative, Simply ignore it.

MAINTAIN POSITIVE VIEW OF THE PEOPLE. , maybe you don't like their message or behavior , but that doesn't mean you hate them personally.

REALIZE THAT HAVING NEGATIVE FEELINGS WILL JUST HURT YOU NOT THEM, so try not to entertain negative feelings.

LOOK AT THE NEGATIVE SITUATION AS YOUR TRAINING SESSIONS FOR REAL LIFE
The higher you climb in life, the worst the negative situation would be. So better prepared for them.

IF YOU MAKE A MISTAKES, BE OPEN TO ADMIT IT, realized that you can't please everyone . In fact nobody can. Sometimes you need to just let it go. If you try to please everyone , You'll end up pleasing no one.

Many of us may choose to stay negative in a negative situation, but it's good for our soul to choose positive reaction despite the situation.

Thanks sis for this post..
It's so true.. We often get when we feel bad so the best option to do is #1 Never respond when you are not calm..
First we have to release all the tensions and displace it to an object or else it would displaced to someone else and you'd end up hurting this person..then we should take time to calm down..when you are already calm then it would be safe to make a conversation to someone.

Thank you Laura for this post this is an interesting topic.

I would like to share mine. As a teacher I have to break my focus on the negative situation and allow me staying positive in the classroom.

I normally approach each lesson as though I am about to perform on stage. If I am feeling agitated or unhappy I force myself to push aside those feelings and show my excitement about the topic we are about to discuss. I have noticed that lately I have been stuck in a state of boredom when it comes to teaching. I have tried various tricks to get myself out of the rut. Thinking about the needs of the students and why I love teaching seems to help me the most.

I have to remind myself that the students I work with have a lot of interesting ideas. I remember all of the negative experiences I have had as a student and how I can offer a better option for those I teach. I look out at their faces and remember just how hard it is to grow up. Not only are they learning new ideas in school and being tested, they are trying to figure out who they are and how they fit in. I guess what this does for me is break my focus on the negative and allows me to see what is right in front of me with a clear perspective. I hate getting caught up in myself because the greatest feeling I have is when I know that my energy today has helped someone. Maybe I just encouraged them to participate in class or showed them how they can understand more than they thought they were capable of, but that is important to me.

As a teacher I become exhausted and burnt out if I allow myself to stop seeing all the reasons I love what I do. There are days when it is hard for me to remember and I need to have other teachers help me. I am very grateful to my colleagues’ help and sharing our ideas.

I just put in my mind that I have a responsibility, an awesome opportunity to touch the future and when I feel burnt out, I let the students lift me up and remind me that they are counting on me to inspire, motivate and teach them.

thank you too Tita Lina, when I was young I wanted to be a teacher too, and maybe in the next few years, I might pursue that dream of mine, cause I like children, . In my teenage years I used to be hot-tempered, but as I grow older, and meet a lot of people I
have learn to extent my patient and still get angry sometimes though that would only happen once in a blue moon, hahaha!

I've learn not to take things seriously but do not take for granted your responsibilities. Since our site is mostly forum, and we always exchange ideas, this might help not to heat any situation, and so far It has never been happen , and I still continue to pray that it will never happen. That our community will continue to have peace and harmony.

There are times when it is really difficult to combat a bad feeling/situation wherein you we're caught unguarded so I think the best

solution is to cry it all out to God then suddenly all of your hang ups and stress would go away and suddenly you will feel calm, this is

a good catharsis so that you won't feel burn out and stressed.

@laura: You should've fulfilled that dream..
it's really nice to teach children and see them grow with the good values that you taught them..

I believed staying positive in the negative way takes a lot of maturity, discipline and control. It comes with age, when you are younger you tend to be more wild, aggressive and hot tempered/blooded you don't think much of the consequences unlike when you get older your more wiser, calm and mature. In my case, it had taken me years to master, these things and i've learned always the hard way, but you know, if given a chance i would never change anything, otherwise i won't be a great person that iam now.

So aside from the tips Laura given us, i just wanted to share something that works for me ( it might work for you )

1.) INSTEAD OF FINDING POSITIVE FROM OTHER PEOPLE YOU MUST FIND YOUR POSITIVE SIDE FIRST. Knowing the kind of person you are will let you handle any given situation. Your weaknesses and your good points will be your armor and shield for that unexpected battle ahead. It is always nice to understand yourself first before understanding others. If your going to find the positive side of the other person, you will never know unless you understand it yourself.

2.) KNOW YOUR LIMITATION. We must accept that all of us have our "pick point" and when you reach that point of explosion, a serge of highly heavy emotion is released, this can be good and bad. Bad because you created an uncomfortable situation nevertheless a word of "sorry" or "forgive me" with full sincerity always saves the day. Good because you let out those stressful feelings!! every now and then we need to release these feelings it is good for the heart. You might also try shouting somewhere just to release those tensions that you feel. It feels great afterwards!!

3.) GIVE A HUMOR IN YOUR LIFE. To lighten up heavy atmosphere and situation, it doesn't hurt to put a humor in situation in fact it is the best way in "breaking the ice". Laughter is the best way to minimize negative thoughts and situations. Create a positive and light and attractive energy in yourself, don't take matters too seriously.

4.) FORGIVE AND FORGET. The heavy burden and emotional stress that your feeling might be from luck of forgiveness from you. This is basically the reasons why most of the people can't "move on", if you can't find it in your heart to forgive then you can never be strong person. Let it be, what happened is what happened you can never change it, the best way is to "move on" forgive and forget and start looking for a better future with a happy person that you are.

I am an emotional person, when i was younger i easily get hurt with just a simple comment. It would take me days to come over it! but now that i reached this stage, where i understand myself more my strongest point and my weakness create a dramatic impact in my life. Before i don't accept who i am, knowing my bad side, but i realize that all of us have our bad side, a person can't be perfect then i started to accept it,well, what-do-you know my bad side can also be a good side if you know how to do it!! It can!! it's possible!! that's what i call over-coming your weaknesses!!